Thursday, November 29, 2012

Let there be Truth

So here it goes. 

The blog that is in my head.  

It has been an interesting year for me.  You know that feeling of absolute bliss, where your body screams with delight, you are smiling so hard that you can almost cry.. Well that is how I feel... and there is the feeling like I am crumbling and any movement will break me into a million pieces.  

I have been depressed pretty much my whole life. It is stupid. So, so stupid.  I wasn't diagnosed until a few years ago and I have been on and off medication, which I absolutely hate.  (and yes I know depression is not really stupid.. it is just a how i feel sometimes). 

I have written a book on how depression affected me, and I can not bring myself to open it. 

So I have done all the things that make you forget less and yet I always come back to this very place. Instead of playing the game of ring-a-round the fucking rosies, I have been in attempts to shake it's dirty little hand and make an event of it.  

The outcome has been... well, in all honesty, painful.  It is dark and sometimes I want to give up. But the event continues on..

In all this I have somehow fallen in absolute Love with a Man that has never let me fall all the way down the rabbit hole.  He listens and never judges, and with that I am reminded of how strong I am and how I can get through it.. 

In the process I know for a fact that talking about it, in my own way, will heal me and I will be OK.. and that the bliss I feel in my Heart will only get better and that the aches will not ever go away but I will be a better navigator. 

That is all for tonight. Thank you for listening.

Thursday, September 13, 2012

Hi~

Ever since I was a little girl, I have understood the wide range of life.  I have seen and felt what Love is, and what it is not.  I have always been so afraid of the aches and the darkness; there was a shame I could never really embrace.  I have also experienced countless amounts of joys and bliss that I will eternally keep me smiling.

This blog is my Truth. It is my raw self with all its layers.  I want to explore and continue to seek new perspectives, as well as feel 100% okay with the ME that I am today.  

I am here for me.. but in a way would love to be a tool for you too; to share and explore the dark and glow in our light.  

I can't wait to see what adventures we may find! Be true, love always.  


"Light and shawdow by turns- but always Love"